How to Become More Beautiful

What is Beauty?

Beauty, is one of the most desirable and sought after qualities in our society today.  Every store, even grocery stores and dollar stores, have a "beauty" aisle.  Filled with pinks and reds, and pictures of happy and perfectly flawless women  The "beauty" aisle says, "Come and become happy, become desirable, and become beautiful."

*not my photo

Nearly every shopping center has a business offing waxing, dying, nail coloring, or some other beautifying service, and even most of the popular websites have a beauty section.

 

There is nothing wrong with beauty, in fact beauty comes from God and can help point us to Him.  But, what kind of beauty are we placing emphasis on?  Amazon says, "Discover beautiful things..." Yahoo had a tiny lipstick icon next to the Beauty link and Twitter's link says, "Beauty and cosmetic brands."  All three sites associate beauty with physical things or appearance.  

There are so many kinds of beauty, the beauty of a song, of nature, of a kind word.  Why is it we are so focused on physical beauty, especially that of a woman?  I think it is because we instinctively know that woman are the most beautiful of all of God's creations.  In the Bible we have the creation stories and it is the woman who is created last, after all the stars, the plants, the animals, after everything Eve is created from Adam's rib.  This symbolizes that the woman is the height of God's creation, the crown.  But, Eve did not need to get a makeover first, she was created beautiful.  Not only was she created beautiful, but all woman are created beautiful.  Beauty is natural to a woman, she does not need to do anything to become beautiful because she is born that way! 

So the question is, why all fuss?  Why the beauty salons?  Why the makeup aisles, why the all the worry about which outfit to wear or concern over a hair out of place?  I believe the world and the devil have many woman tricked into not recognizing their own beauty.  Men usually recognize it, but the woman themselves have some sort of blindness to their own beauty.  Men even write songs about this very thing!  If woman would recognize their own beauty there would be no need for all the makeup, waxing, and tanning and the rest of it.

How do we fix it?

The Bible gives us some help.  Matthew 23:25-26 "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, you hypocrites.  You cleanse the outside of cup and dish, but inside they are full of plunder and self-indulgence.  Blind Pharisee, cleanse first the inside of the cup, so that the outside also may be clean."  Jesus goes on to give another example describing the Pharisees as whitewashed tombs, nice and clean outside, but full of dead man's bones inside.  This whole chapter is about doing things to look good to others on the outside, but doing this for the wrong reason, to win other's praise.  Today many women put a lot of time and effort into making their outside look beautiful to win praise or affection from others, but they do not put effort into making their insides beautiful.  This over emphasis on the outside corrupts the inside making us unhappy, irritable, and even depressed simply because we are so focused on our own outward appearance.   A question to ask yourself is, why?  Why am I putting on this makup?  Why am I spending so much time exercising?  If the answer is to gain something from others, or to hide from yourself because you do not like who you are as a person, then the inside of your cup needs to be cleaned.  On the other hand if your answer to these questions is; because you want to stay healthy and look your best because you recognize your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, then encourage and pray for the woman around you that they may come to see themselves the way God sees them too. 

So in the Bible Jesus says, "to cleanse first the inside of the cup, so that the outside also may be clean."  The first step to cleansing your insides is repentance.  One must first recognize and admit there is a problem before any healing can begin.  If you ignore a mess in your house it doesn't go away by itself, it must be tackled head on.  Repentance and (the Sacrament of Confession for Catholics) acknowledging ones sins and failings before God is how to start getting rid of all the dirt on our soul.  Like any bad mess that has been left untended for far too long, this will take time and effort, and a lot of patience with yourself.  I have found, at times in my life, that it is not possible for me to stop a sinful habit that has been ongoing for far a long.  The only way to rid oneself of such a habit it so admit to yourself and to God that you can not overcome this sin.  Then allow God to overcome it for you.  This is very difficult to do, especially in our society that practically demands that everyone be self sufficient and to avoid asking anyone for a favor at all costs.  Asking God for help does require humility, but it is not like asking a neighbor or relative for help, because we can not inconvenience God and He delights in helping us.  He creates everything for us, all that we are and all that we have is from Him so to ask Him for His assistance is natural and normal and should be done often in even the smallest of situations or circumstances. 

Once all of the major messes (sins) have been dealt with (don't worry if this takes hours or years just keep at it) it is time to start striving for virtue.  The Catechism of the Catholic Church says "A virtue is an habitual and firm disposition to do the good. It allows the person not only to perform good acts, but to give the best of himself. The virtuous person tends toward the good with all his sensory and spiritual powers; he pursues the good and chooses it in concrete actions."  Basically the idea is to replace the old sinful habits with new virtuous habits. The CCC has really good descriptions of what all of the vitures are and how to practice them.  Here is a list of what they are for reference but I recommend looking them up in the Catechism:

Prudence

Justice

Fortitude 

Temperance

Faith 

Hope

Charity 

Place your focus on striving for these virtues and growing in holiness.  A seminarian at my Church described holiness is as, "...not about how good you are or how moral you are, it is about how much you allow Jesus to love you."  Holiness and goodness do not come from us, they come from God we just have to make room in our souls and allow Him to fill us with it.  

A good start is making a choice to spend some time just sitting with God every day.  Some people like to have their morning coffee,with Jesus, other prefer to sit with Him while driving to work, or taking a walk.  Find what works for you then allow Him to start leading you closer to Him.  

The virtues can seem very abstract so it's helpful to think of practical ways to exercise them.  To practice fortitude think of a daily annoyance, perhaps traffic, or an irritating person you encounter daily, make a decision to remain positive and cheerful the next time you encounter this situation.  Or for temperance only use one sugar in your morning coffee instead of two, or only watch one episode of your favorite show instead of five.  There are countless little ways to begin practicing virtue.  When these small ways become easy for you try something harder.  This is how you stretch you spiritual muscles.  But, be careful to make growing closer the Lord your first priority, because giving up little joys does us no good if we are not offering these things to the Lord.  If we do them for ourselves and our own pride they can be more harmful than helpful in our spiritual journey.  So always allow the Lord to lead you in these matters.     

True Beauty

When you put more focus on keeping your inside clean, your outside will become clean too.  This shows up in the form of joy.  Have you ever meet someone that just radiates joy and you can't help but feel happier around them?  This is the joy of the Lord and it spills out of our soul and shows up in our eyes and faces.  It's a beauty that can not be contained. 

It is very freeing to be happy with who you are on the inside.  When you allow God to clean you up you will feel lighter, and any shame from your past deeds will disappear.  You will no longer need to hide who you are with spray on tans, or manicures.  If you do these things it should be done in such a way that shows respect and love for your body that is created by God and to give Him glory.  It is good to take care of your body on the inside and out, its just that when your insides are clean you don't have to overcompensate on the outside to try and hide the inside.  The inside beauty can shine forth and so can the outside.

While I intellectually know this to be the truth, I find it very difficult to actually live out.  So please do not be discouraged if you do not feel an overwhelming sense of joy and God's love upon you all the time.  The truth is that God loves you perfectly and infinitely.  He also loves you personally and uniquely so that each person has a different sort of relationship with Him.  You must allow Him to reveal to you the personal relationship He has in mind for the two of you.  Only then can you truly become the beautiful person God created you to be.